撰寫日期：2010年09月23日
前陣子，看了這一則故事分享，是關於MJ不慶祝生辰的原因。不管你喜不喜歡他，即使是一個普通人有這樣的經歷，相信同樣感到難受。自己看完時，雖跟自己小時候的不能慶生的原因有異，但那種心酸的感覺，却是同樣深刻，令我清楚明白他當時的感受。
先把這故事放上來，當中有一些涉及宗教的內容，是我不明白的，不過那些已是MJ經歷了的過去，改變不了的歷史。
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資料來源 ：化妝師Karen Faye的部落格
翻譯來源 ：MJJCN邁克爾•杰克遜中國網
翻譯 ：ilmj1314 (原翻譯文為簡體字)
日期 ：2010年08月30日
整理 ：畑鹿驚
從一開始，邁克爾的生日都讓我左右為難。從第一天我們見面，那時還不熟悉，我就得面對他耶和華見證人的身份。
當邁克爾來拍攝《顫栗》（Thriller）照，兩個穿著得體的男人跟隨者他，他們坐在一旁舒適的沙發上，觀察著邁克爾的每一個動作。
這是我第一次於他工作，我覺得詢問這兩個男人是誰有些不合適。我想如果他想讓我們知道，就會告訴我們。我只感覺他們整天都在那裡。他們像來的時候那樣跟邁克爾一起離開。那時，我真沒有什麼別的想法，因為我不知道將來我要面對的冒險。
下一次拍照，又是這樣……一個神秘男人，坐在背後。
隨著我們的工作關系和友誼開始深入，我問了邁克爾。他解釋說他是耶和華見證人。他是教堂的積極分子，那些男人是監視他的人，他們監視他。他還解釋他要參加學習聖經，並每周花時間挨家挨戶的宣傳。我必須停下來思考……
《顫栗》發行時他這樣給我解釋。
“你的意思是，你按了一家人的門鈴，他們應聲開門，發現門口站著邁克爾 傑克遜？？？？”
他笑的就像鈴聲版響亮，解釋說他是經過偽裝了的。
“哦，不，不會吧。”
他仍然咯咯笑著，突然停下來並一本正經的說“是的，是這樣。他們讓我進去後，一般情況就覺得我看起來很好笑，所以最後我還是得承認我是誰。”
“哦……，我真希望自己是只蒼蠅趴在牆上看看。我仍然不能相信你那樣做。”我說
“這是作為耶和華見證人很重要的一部分，我們也不慶祝生日和節日。我們信仰我們每天都在慶祝，而不是特定的某一天。”
於是我問到“沒有生日，沒有聖誕節？”
“沒有，”他回答。
“當全世界都在裝飾，唱聖誕歌，你覺得困難嗎？”
“是的，挺傷感的，特別當我是個孩子，因為那看起來有趣極了。但還好，我們有比如家庭日，大家聚集起來。傑克遜家族有上百人，我們盡量都聚集起來。”
我能真正的看到他眼中的悲傷，能感覺到他失落的感受，不能與其他孩子歡度聖誕……於是我改變了話題。
8月29日，我們結束了工作。每個人都祝他生日快樂，並送給他小禮物。他微笑著客氣的接受了。一旦我們私下在拖車裡，他將禮物放在椅子上，看著它們。
“我不希望人們在這樣做了，請向我保證，不要在祝我生日快樂。”
我崩潰了。我再一次看到他在這件事上感到的悲傷和矛盾，但他仍然對他的信仰忠貞不渝。這對我來說也很困難。每當8月29日，我都想送他禮物給他一個個大大的擁抱，加入到慶祝他生日的隊伍。但我也想遵循他的要求甚至不說生日快樂。
當我們開始拍攝《犯罪高手》（Smooth Criminal），我已經熟悉了那些監視人。向往常一樣，影片比計劃的要長。我們正在准備一個大場景。邁克爾被外星軍隊包圍。
武器和軍火特效組要將會邁克爾怎麼握住機關車並開火。這是那晚最後一個場景。邁克爾很高興，就像一個小男孩。他站姿穩健，隨著攝像機拍攝而開槍。
那晚的任務完成，第二天早上還有通告。
第二天早上邁克爾稍微來遲了點。我在拖車裡等著他，他心煩意亂的走進來。我不知道怎麼了，前晚我們還很高興。他坐在化妝椅上沉默不語。我不得不問問怎麼了。
他的眼裡包含著淚水“母親昨晚給我打電話了。教堂打電話給她告訴說我昨天拿著槍開火了。他們命令我必須做出選擇。我必須離開教會或遠離娛樂業。”他抽泣著說完。
我非常窘迫，“你母親建議你怎麼做？”
“她害怕極了，她告訴我這取決於我，她說不論我選擇什麼，她都站在我這邊。”
“我知道了，你今天來了。”
“是的。”
“母親支持我的決定。”
邁克爾適應這個決定花了一段時間。對於生日，他仍然覺得不安，但參加了歌迷舉辦的慶祝活動，並非常享受。
當聖誕時，我在他身邊，他會躲在自己的密室裡悄悄的拆禮物。他仍然有些許罪惡感。我知道這對他來說很困難，但我知道他熱愛所有的裝飾品。他為他的兒女們慶祝他從沒有過的生日。我知道耶和華見證人的教會仍然在他內心深處保留著神聖的地位。這就是為什麼一直以來我害怕說“生日快樂”。他從來沒有讓我收回諾言。
Original article from Karen Faye's blog:
From the beginning it was always a quandary for me, Michael’s birthday. From the first day we met, unfamiliar to me, I was faced with his chosen religion, Jehovah’s Witness.
When Michael arrived for his photo shoot for THRILLER, two men accompanied him impeccably dressed in suits, who sat over to the side on some cushy couches and watched his every move.
Since this was the first time I worked with him, it didn’t feel appropriate for me to ask who they could possibly be. I thought if he wanted us to know, he would have told us. I just felt their presence throughout the entire day. They left with him as mysteriously as they had entered with him. At the time I really did not give it another thought, because I had no idea of the adventure that was ahead of me.
The next shoot, there again…a mysterious gentleman, sitting in the background.
As our working relationship and friendship began to grow, I asked. He explained to me he was a Jehovah’s Witness. He was very active with the church, and these gentlemen were monitors. They watched over him. He also explained he went to bible study, and spent time going door-to-door teaching the word each week. I had to take pause for a minute and think about that one….
THRILLER had been released by the time he was explaining this to me. “You mean to tell me, that you ring someone’s doorbell, they come to answer it, and there stands Michael Jackson??????”
He gave me one of his hi pitched belly laughs…and said, “yeah”. He further explained that he does it in disguise.
“Oh no you don’t.”
Still giggling, he paused and got amusingly serious. “Yeah, sure. After they let me in, they usually begin to look at me funny, so I end up admitting who I am.”
“Wow, I wish I could be a fly on the wall and watch that. I still can’t believe you do that.” I said.
“It is a big part of being a Jehovah’s Witness. We also do not celebrate holidays or birthdays. We believe that we should honor and celebrate these things daily, and not have just one day.”
So I asked “No birthdays. No Christmas?”
“No” he replied.
“Isn’t that difficult, when the world around you is decorating and singing carols?”.
“Yes, Turkle…it is always kind of sad, especially when I was a child, because it looked like so much fun. But it is okay; we have things like FAMILY DAY, where we all get together. There are hundreds of Jackson’s and we all try and be there.”
I could genuinely see the sadness in his eyes and the sense his feeling of loss, not celebrating Christmas with the other kids…so I changed the subject.
One August 29th, we ended up working. Everyone was wishing him Happy Birthday and giving him little presents. He smiled and graciously accepted them. Once we were in the privacy of the trailer, he put the gifts down on the seat, and looked down at them.
“I wish people wouldn’t do that. Please promise me, Turkle, don’t EVER say Happy Birthday to me.”
I was torn. I once again saw how sad and conflicted he was on the inside about this, but he remained loyal to his beliefs. It was so difficult for me too. I wanted to give him a present and a big birthday hug every time August 29th rolled around, and join in with the others who were celebrating his birthday around him. I also wanted to comply with his request not to even SAY happy birthday.
We were shooting SMOOTH CRIMINAL. I was accustomed to the monitors by now. The filming was going on longer than planned, as usual. We were preparing for a very big scene. Michael was surrounded by the alien battalion in a gully, built on stage 14.
The special weapons and ammunition team had briefed Michael on how to hold the machine gun and fire it. It was the last scene of the evening. Michael was having fun with it, like a little boy playing army. He took a strong stance, and fired as the cameras rolled.
That was a wrap for that evening, and we were given our call time for the next morning.
Michael was a little late arriving the next day. I was waiting in his trailer. He walked in so distraught. I didn’t understand, we were having so much fun the night before. He was silent as he sat in the makeup chair. I had to ask him please tell me. Please tell me what is wrong.
His eyes welled up with tears. “Mother called last night. The church called her, and told her that I held and fired a gun yesterday. They ordered that I have to make decision. I must leave the church, or leave the entertainment industry.” He was weeping as he uttered those words.
I was quite mortified. “What did your mother advise you to do?”
“She felt horrible. She told me it was up to me. She said she would stand by me with whatever I decided.”
“I see, you are here today”.
“Yes”
“Mother is supporting my choice”.
It took a while for Michael to adjust to his choice. He continued to feel uncomfortable with his birthday, but attended fan events in his honor, and truly enjoyed them.
When I was around him during Christmas, he would hide in his own closet to secretly wrap presents. He still held a tinge of guilt. I knew it was difficult for him, but I know he loved all the decorations that NEVER came down. He could freely give his children the birthdays that he never had. I knew deep down inside the Jehovah Witness teachings continued to hold a sacred place inside of him. That is why I was forever torn by not saying “Happy Birthday”. He never released me from my promise to not say it to him.
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